Emotional Hypersensitivity: Make sure the trees don’t keep you from seeing the forest

For some people the small problems of everyday are insurmountable obstacles. They over-react, get angry for the small mishaps and get depressed about things that others would consider irrelevant. These people find it difficult to cope with life from a more detached and objective point of view, it is as if they had always been skin-deep emotions. Similarly, they are able to detect small emotional signals from others, and can recognize before others the suffering, pain or sadness, as they had a very strong sixth sense. Why?

Emotional hypersensitivity may have a genetic basis

Researchers at the University of British Columbia and the University of Toronto think that the root of emotional hypersensitivity can be found in a genetic variant that, surprisingly, have just the 50% of the Caucasians, but is encountered to a lesser extent also in other ethnic groups.

The gene in question is called ADRA2b and its main function is to regulate norepinephrine, a neurotransmitter that is related to stress and affects areas of the brain such as the amygdala, linked to emotional responses. In fact, noradrenaline acts as a drug by increasing heart rate and blood pressure, so that prepares the body for fight or flight.

In practice, the variation of this gene causes an increased activation of brain regions placed under emotional processing. In fact, these researchers found that these people not only react differently to situations but also perceive it differently from the first moment.

It's all a matter of perception

In the experiment, people had to see a series of images, some were original and others were copies to which was added some defect, they were not 100% perfect since they had some parts blurry or pixilated.

The goal of the researchers was to see if people were able to notice those little flaws, so thay mingled all the photos. In this way it was possible to find out that who owned the variant of the gene ADRA2b could notice those little details as it focused on the colors, shapes and sizes, rather than on the big picture, unlike the rest of the participants.

The researchers also found that these people showed greater activation of the frontal cortex, which indicates that their attention and memory were working at full capacity to capture and compare more accurately the details. At the same time it was detected an increased activity of the amygdala, the structure associated with emotional responses.

Emotional Hypersensitivity: A double-edged sword

Undoubtedly to see the world in a different way will also make we react differently. Our perception determines our reactions, especially at an emotional level. Therefore, people who are able to fix on the details tend to be more sensitive and empathetic as they capture quickly the small signs of discomfort or stress shown by others and are able to adapt their behavior based on these.

However, this ability is a double edged sword, because by focusing too much on the details we may even lose the global sight. These people run the risk of seeing the trees but not the forest, and this can lead them to overreact at the small details that for others may go unnoticed or simply do not give importance. Therefore, people emotionally hypersensitive are also more likely to get angry or sad.

Emotional Hypersensitivity can be a gift, but also increases the risk of suffering problems such as post-traumatic stress disorder, depression and anxiety. The key is to be aware of this way of seeing the world and learning to control the first emotional reaction, trying to analyze the situation as a whole.


Source:
Todd, R. M. et. Al. (2015) Neurogenetic Variations in Norepinephrine Availability Enhance Perceptual Vividness. The Journal of Neuroscience; 35(16): 6506-6516.http://psychology-spot.blogspot.co.id/2016/09/emotional-hypersensitivity.html

Psychology Spot ~ 11:30 AM

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Emotional Hypersensitivity: Make sure the trees don’t keep you from seeing the forest

5 advantages of being the younger brother

The order in which we are born affects our personality characteristics. Of all the brothers, the smallest are generally reported as the most problematic, irresponsible and demanding. In fact, parents often do not expect too much from the minor children preferring to put their hopes on older ones. Furthermore, during their childhood and adolescence younger brothers are easy target of jokes and pranks by older siblings. No doubt, this will end up shaping their personality and the way they react to situations.

However, a recent study shows that younger brothers are not the black sheep of the family and can be very successful, a success that could be largely determined by family situations they have dealt with since childhood.

1. They have a more adventurous spirit

Unlike the first-born, which usually assume the role of leader in front of smaller brothers, youngers are forced to find their own role, first within the family and later in life.

The interesting thing is that to find their place and assert their talent, younger siblings are forced to experiment and get out of their comfort zone in advance. Therefore, it is likely they become more open to new experiences, willing to take on challenges and explore.

2. They are more friendly

Eddie Murphy, Stephen Colbert, Jennifer Lawrence and Tina Fey have two things in common: they are the younger brothers of the family and they are very funny. But it is not a coincidence.

A study conducted in the UK revealed that the younger siblings are often considered the most fun while older consider themselves more serious. One theory suggests that the ability to make others laugh is due to the fact that the younger brothers needed to attract the attention of parents and other family members, and probably have learned to do it with sympathy.

3. They tend to feel more relaxed

Younger brothers tend to take a more relaxed lifestyle and cope better with stress, which is due, at least in part, to the fact that parents used a more relaxed style of education with them, showing a laissez-faire type attitude they didn’t use with the first child.

In fact, parents often tend to be overprotective with older children and overload them with responsibility and take a more permissive style with minor ones. This means that minor children feel more free and can face life from a more relaxed perspective.

4. They are successful in interpersonal relationships

The first-born tend to be more assertive, while younger siblings are often more sociable and fun-loving. Again, this feature is due to the fact that they were forced to find their role in the family, they had to learn to manage by themselves their own situations and were also forced to “manipúlate” a bit their parents.

Therefore, smaller brothers are often very good at making new friends and show excellent interpersonal intelligence. In fact, they also have a special gift being able to put people on their side, which is not surprising since fighting with siblings probably they had to fight hard to convince parents that the fault was not theirs.

5. They are more creative

As a general rule, older siblings tend to have a slightly higher IQ, but the little ones are more creative. The latest arrivals in the family often avoid the paths that have already been beaten by older siblings, so they need to develop their creativity.

Younger brothers develop new interests and skills that are not measured with the conventional intelligence tests. So it is clear that younger brothers prefer more creative professions, such as design, architecture, writing or art, while older ones opt for more conventional professions.


Sources:
(2015) It's true: birth order shapes personality. YouGov Survey Results.
Sulloway, F. J. (1999) Birth Orden. Encyclopedia of Creativity: 189-202.
http://psychology-spot.blogspot.co.id/2016/07/younger-brothers-psychology.html

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5 advantages of being the younger brother

Do you speak two languages? Then you have more gray matter

In recent decades, our understanding of bilingualism has changed a lot. At first it was thought that mastering two vocabularies were causing language disorders in children. However, it has been shown that it is false. In fact, bilinguals perform better in school activities that require a good deal of attention, short-term memory and inhibition of impulses, it is what is known in psychology as “executive control”.

It is believed that the advantage of “bilingualism” is not due only to learning a new language, but, above all, to the systematic use of both. But there are still many people who doubt this, so neuroscientists at Georgetown University Medical Center have decided to establish if indeed speaking two languages ​​is so beneficial for the brain.

In the experiment it was measured the volume of gray matter of the monolinguals and bilinguals. So they found that, in fact, people who speak two languages ​​have more gray matter in the frontal and parietal lobes, which are the areas of the brain involved in executive control.

What is the function of gray matter?

The gray matter is found mainly in the cerebral cortex, the most complex area of ​​the nervous system. The cells that make up the gray matter does not contain myelin, so they can not quickly transmit nerve impulses. Their function is to process information and facilitate the reasoning. So it has been associated the amount of gray matter with intelligence and ability to solve problems.

But the most interesting is that the volume of gray matter that exists in the brain depends largely on the experiences that people are living throughout life. In fact, a study conducted at University College London found that taxi drivers have more gray matter in areas of the brain involved in spatial navigation, which is not surprising since for their profession are forced to use a lot more of these areas of the brain.

Why speaking two languages ​​is so beneficial for the brain?

These neuroscientists have wondered if the increase in gray matter volume was due to speaking two languages ​​or rely on some unique vocabulary learned. To find an answer, they are not limited to analyze the brains of bilingual and monolingual people, but also worked with people who dominated their mother tongue and also knew sign language.

In this way they discovered that only those who speak two languages ​​have a greater volume of gray matter. These results suggest that changes in the brain are not simply due to the acquisition of a larger vocabulary, but depend on the effort made by our brain when we speak, since it is forced to disconnect a language to turn the other, thus involving different areas brain.

In fact, a previous study conducted at the University of Kentucky showed that bilinguals are better at multitasking because they can connect and disconnect rapidly. They are also more flexible and can adapt more quickly to unexpected changes. What's more, it is known that these skills are maintained into adulthood, so that learning a second language also protects the brain from dementia.

These studies reveal that our brain has an enormous plasticity and changes depending on the stimuli, even in adulthood. Therefore, if you do not know a second language you still have time to learn it and, above all, practice it.


Sources:
Olulade, O. A. et. Al. (2016) Neuroanatomical Evidence in Support of the Bilingual Advantage Theory. Cerebral Cortex; 26 (7): 3196-3204.
Gold, B. T. et. Al. (2013) Lifelong Bilingualism Maintains Neural Efficiency for Cognitive Control in Aging. The Journal of Neuroscience; 33(2): 387-396.
Fergur, I. M. et. Al. (2010) Delaying the onset of Alzheimer disease. Bilingualism as a form of cognitive reserve. Neurology; 75(19): 1726-1729.
Maguire, E. A. et. Al. (2006) London taxi drivers and bus drivers: a structural MRI and neuropsychological analysis. Hippocampus;16(12): 1091-1101.
http://psychology-spot.blogspot.co.id/2016/07/speak-multiple-languages.html

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Do you speak two languages? Then you have more gray matter

Mother's stress changes the son's genes

For decades we have heard that children are like sponges. Now science shows that this statement is true. But this enormous capacity to adapt to the environment is a double-edged sword. In the early years of life neurons have an enormous plasticity, which means that the brain can develop a great potential or, on the contrary, can undergo a damage difficult to repair. And parents have a crucial role to tilt the balance in one direction or another.

The relationship that parents establish with the child, their ability to satisfy his emotional needs and also his state of mind during the early years, influence the psychological development of the small boy and leave a deep mark that probably will accompany him throughout life.

In fact, several studies have linked maternal depression with the onset of mental disorders in children. It is also known that when parents have marital problems and often argue, their children become emotionally insecure and have difficulty establishing healthy relationships in adulthood. In addition, it is also seen that when parents are subject to high stress is more likely that children develop an emotional problem.

Now, a new study conducted at the University of Wisconsin revealed that problems are not limited to psychological level, the parental stress may also alter the genetics of their children by making sure that in their brain will be forming connections that will eventually affect their reaction to adversity.

In fact, it is the first time that scientists find a link between parental stress and DNA of children. This study shows that parents, and our experiences in general, may affect our genetics.

The stress response is partly determined by genes

The idea that stress can damage DNA and brain development comes from a study conducted in 2004 at McGill University. These researchers worked with mice and found that when mothers cared carefully their sons it was activated a gene in their brain that triggered a mechanism through which young mice developed increased tolerance to stress, they were able to better adapt to changes, showed less fear and were more likely to explore their environment.

Subsequently, a study of the Douglas Mental Health University Institute made with human, revealed that child abuse and parental neglect can also mute the receptors of stress hormones in the brain. It was noted that in children who had suffered abuse in childhood and who later committed suicide, the gene that had to activate the receptors of stress hormones remained inactive.

The problem is when this gene is silenced, the response to stress natural system does not work properly, so it is more difficult to address the problems and adversity, and these people are more likely to develop psychological disorders and commit suicide.

In fact, another study conducted at the University of British Columbia found that when mothers are depressed or anxious, the gene responsible for receptor activation of stress hormones tended to be inactive in infants. As a result these children are more fearful, they find it difficult to adapt to changes and will have problems to deal with stressful situations.

Stressed mothers, children less resilient

This new study reveals that to experience some changes at the DNA level is not necessary that children suffer physical abuse. These researchers analyzed hundreds of parents for more than a decade. Parents completed a series of questionnaires at different times during the life of their children when they were infants, 3 and 4 years of age and later, upon reaching adolescence. Through questionnaires, the researchers assessed the level of parental stress. After they had reached the age of 15 years, the scientists analyzed the DNA of these 109 adolescents.

Thus they found differences in the DNA of young people whose parents had shown greater levels of stress. It was also noted that the stress of both parents did not affect in the same way. In fact, a high level of stress in mothers during the first years of children's lives was related with alterations in 139 genes. Fathers’ stress accounted less, although it could be related to changes in 31 genes. This difference may be due to the fact that many fathers are less involved in raising children, so it is likely that the impact of their emotional state is minor.

Another important finding indicates that stress of mothers and fathers does not cause significant changes in the expression of genes when took place after 3 years of age. This could be due to the fact that the first three years of life are the phase of maximum plasticity of the brain, when the brain regions are able to adapt more and also assume the functions of other sectors if the subject suffer any brain damage. From this age, the brain continues to change, but it does so at a slower pace.

Among the altered genes (normally silenced) by stress have been met two which are particularly important for brain development and behavior as they are related to cellular communication and the membranes of neurons. One of the genes involved is the Neurog1, which stimulates the growth of new neurons, which is crucial for growth, learning and memory.

Researchers explain that these changes in the expression of DNA affect the way in which neural connections are established, and then, the functioning of the brain. In practice, silencing the gene responsible for receptor activation of stress hormones, the child will not have the necessary tools to neruological level to cope with difficult situations. If there are not enough receptors for hormones such as cortisol and adrenaline, they remain active, causing damage to the body, while the brain is unable to find an appropriate solution. Therefore, it is likely that the child will be more irritable, impulsive and fearful.

However, it should be clear that our brain has an amazing plasticity, so despite changes in gene expression it does not mean that these children can not learn to manage stress assertively developing a more resistant attitude when they reach adolescence or adulthood, but it will be more difficult.

In any case, the message for parents is clear: stress is harmful not only for adults but also for children, especially if they are very small.


Sources:
Essex, M. J. et. Al. (2013) Epigenetic Vestiges of Early Developmental Adversity: Childhood Stress Exposure and DNA Methylation in Adolescence. Child Development; 84(1): 58-75.
McGowan, P. O. et. Al. (2009) Epigenetic regulation of the glucocorticoid receptor in human brain associates with childhood abuse. Nature Neuroscience; 12: 342-348.
Oberlander, T. F. et. Al. (2008) Prenatal exposure to maternal depression, neonatal methylation of human glucocorticoid receptor gene (NR3C1) and infant cortisol stress responses. Epigenetics; 3(2): 97-106.
Preston, S. L. & Scaramella, L. V. (2006) Implications of timing of maternal depressive symptoms for early cognitive and language development. Clin Child Fam Psychol Rev; 9(1): 65-83.
Weaver, I. C. (2004) Epigenetic programming by maternal behavior. Nature Neuroscience; 7(8): 847-854.
http://psychology-spot.blogspot.co.id/2016/07/stressed-parents-with-infants.html

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Mother's stress changes the son's genes

Spontaneous people, secure and relaxed, don’t send messages

The smartphone has changed the way we communicate, especially among the younger generations. In fact, many young people believe that a phone call is too invasive, likely going to someone's house without notice. So, they always send more messages. But the tendency to send messages instead of calling, can reveal a lot about our personality.

We’re messaging more and talking less

Statistics indicate that smartphone users send and receive five times more text messages than phone calls. In fact, it is estimated that an average user spends 26 minutes a day sending messages, but only six minutes talking on the phone.

Certainly, in some cases messages are very effective, but also conceal something antisocial and robotic. In fact, it is very difficult to know exactly what a person feels through a text message. But the sound of the voice quickly reveals the emotional state.

People who send text messages need to maintain control

A study conducted by the Pew Research Center revealed that messages are one of the favorite means for 80% of adolescents to communicate with their friends. But text messages are not only efficient and practical, they also offer a greater sense of control.

Sending messages reduces the complexity of human relationships. In fact, many young people confessed that they do not like talking on the phone because, that way, they can’t control what they want to say and don’t know how long the call will last. Talking on the phone makes them feel insecure.

Curiously, the sense of control generated by text messages is linked to lack of security and self-confidence. One study conducted at the University of Windsor found that using messages rather than calls, causes what is known as “effects of superficiality”, These effects suggests that people are less compromised with what they write.

In fact, researchers at the University of Winnipeg analyzed more than 2,300 college students and found that those who were sending more than 100 text messages a day, reported feeling less confident about their ethical principles in life.

This suggests that sending messages instead of calling, may be the alternative choice for people suffering from anxiety in social situations and who need to maintain the control. On the contrary, those who prefer to call can be more spontaneous, outgoing and with a greater ability to deal with the unexpected.

Text messages allow to establish an emotional distance

In a society increasingly alienated and alienating, many people are afraid to get involved emotionally. Text messages are ideal to create a distance between sender and receiver. This distance drives people away from reality, reduces their anxiety and allows them to say things they would never have had the courage to say face to face.

In fact, more and more couples or friends break the relationships through text messages. This form of communication allows them to quickly get rid of their responsibilities without emotional involvement, without having to bear the consequences that their decisions will have on the other.

In this sense, a very interesting study conducted at the University of North Carolina, has analyzed the mobile phone use and the quality of couple relationships to assess the type of bond that people developed. These psychologists have found that there were couples who exchanged up to 500 messages per day, accounting for 90% of their communication.

They also found a relationship between the number of text messages and the emotional bond:

- Type of bond insecure. These people have not developed a positive image of themselves, are insecure and constantly needing the approval of others. This is why they send many text messages to their partners and friends, because this is a way to find the security they need.

- Type of bond avoidant. These people have learned that expressing their feelings is counterproductive, so they untie from these and establish an emotional distance from others. In this way they avoid being rejected or abandoned. For these people, the text messages, which are always many, turn into a strategy to control the others, as well as being an easier method to maintain the emotional distance that allows them to feel safe.

- Type of bond secure. These people are sure of themselves, they do not need the constant approval of others and are able to establish mature relationships, where there is no room for emotional dependency. It is noteworthy that these people send fewer text messages and prefer to communicate through calls.

Recovering the direct communication

Some psychologists say that the abuse of messaging prevents the new generations from developing the necessary social skills to face life with less stress and anxiety. No doubt, conversation is a skill to be cultivated, because it brings extraordinary benefits and helps us building a strong social network.

For how many emoticons we can use, it is much easier to stimulate a laugh with a call then with a text message. It is also easier to detect sarcasm or anger by listening the voice. Therefore, let’s try to speak as much as possible to avoid text messages whenever we can.


Sources:
Annisette, L. E. & Lafreniere, K. D. (2016) Social media, texting, and personality: A test of the shallowing hypothesis. Personality and Individual Differences.
Smith, A. (2015) U.S. Smartphone Use in 2015. In: Pew Research Center.
Luo, S. (2014) Effects of texting on satisfaction in romantic relationships: The role of attachment. Computers in Human Behavior; 33: 145–152.
Trapnell, P. & Sinclair, L. (2013) Texting Frequency and The Moral Shallowing Hypothesis. In: Universidad de Winnipeg.
http://psychology-spot.blogspot.co.id/2016/07/spontaneous-people-do-not-send-messages.html

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Spontaneous people, secure and relaxed, don’t send messages

What you read is more important than you think

Reading is one of the best habits you can develop, one of the best gifts we can do to ourselves. In fact, it has been shown that a good novel is like a massage for our neurons. However, it is not worth reading just to pass the time, reading anything that comes to hand does not bring benefits, both at the cognitive level and emotional. It is therefore important to be as selective as possible in choosing what we read.

The "light" content doesn’t give anything

A study conducted at the University of Florida has issued a warning: it was discovered that the readings of the university students directly influence their level of writing. These psychologists have found that not only count how often we read but also the quality of the content.

In practice, young people who read magazines and academic literature write with greater sophistication and commit fewer errors than those who only read news and web content. As a result, these psychologists have made a distinction between “deep Reading” and “light Reading”.

Deep reading is slow and engaging, rich in sensory detail, emotional and moral, is a complex interpretation that goes beyond the simple decoding of words. We can talk about deep reading when it contains metaphors, allusions and complex concepts, both cognitively and emotionally. When a novel is deep we can put ourselves in its pages, and promotes reflection and empathy.

However, the “light” reading doesn’t offer these advantages as it is fast, usually receives little attention and is forgotten after a few minutes. These psychologists believe that many of the daily news, entertainment magazines and most insignificant content that can be found on the Internet, can be classified as “light” reading because they do not promote reflection and do not generate emotional involvement.

Deep reading, an explosion of sensations to the brain

Deep reading is an explosion of sensations to our brain. In fact, it was found that activates the various centers of the brain that have to work together so that we can understand what we read and experience firsthand. Reading activates the Broca's area, which allows us to feel the rhythm and syntax, even active Wernicke's area, which is involved in our perception of the words and their meanings, as well as the angular gyrus, which is critical for the perception and the use of language.

What's more, the profound reading also activates other brain areas related to perception and emotions, which indicates that we not only understand what we read, but we are living the adventures into the characters shoes. A good novel is able to activate the brain areas associated with physical sensations and motor systems, as well as the emotional brain, allowing us to laugh or cry along with the characters.

Therefore, it’s not surprisingly to find that a good novel increases the level of the person's empathy, who’s able to better understand the ideas of others, even if different from his own, and share emotional states.

Poetry is a good example of “deep Reading”. Recently, neuroscientists have discovered that all the writings activate what is called the “reading network”, which allows you understand the text, store it and think about it.

But compared to prose, poetry activates areas of the brain which are completely different, especially when it comes to a poetry that we like. In fact, poems activate the posterior cingulate cortex and the medial temporal lobes, parts of the brain linked to introspection, as well as some specific regions of the right hemisphere, the same that react to music.

Therefore, the next time you dedicate a few minutes to read, make sure it's worth it. Choose a material that is exciting for you, that makes you think, awakens your curiosity and you can enjoy.


Sources:
Douglas, Y. & Miller, S. (2016) Syntactic Complexity of Reading Content Directly Impacts Complexity of Mature Students’ Writing. International Journal of Business Administration; 7(3).
Adam, Z. et. Al. (2013) By Heart An fMRI Study of Brain Activation by Poetry and Prose. Journal of Consciousness Studies; 20(9-10): 132-158.
http://psychology-spot.blogspot.co.id/2016/07/what-you-read-is-more-important-than.html

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What you read is more important than you think

For receiving, first learn to let go

An ancient legend tells that a famous scientist went to visit a Zen master. On arrival, he introduced himself by enumerating all the titles that achieved and what he had learned during the years of study.

Then he asked the master to teach him the secrets of his philosophy. In response, the master simply invited him to sit down and offered him a cup of tea.

Apparently distracted, without showing any sign of concern, the master began to pour the tea into the cup of the scientist and continued even when the cup was full.

Puzzled by this behavior, the scientist warned the master that the cup was full and the tea was falling on the table.

The master replied calmly:

- Exactly. You already came with the full cup, how could you learn something?

In front of the incredulous expression of the scientist, the master remarked:

- Unless you empty your cup you will not learn anything.

As for the scientist, often we cling to some beliefs, habits, persons or ways of thinking that keep us from growing. But if we want to seize new opportunities, if we want to receive the gifts that the world still has to offer us, we must first learn to let go what we have. We can not grab new things, if our hands are already full.

Letting go is part of life

Life is always changing and moving forward means that we have to leave some things behind, if we don’t do it and continue to hold them those things will end turning into an unnecessary burden that will prevent us from continuing to reach our goal.

For example, people who move to live in a new country, but continue to feel nostalgia for what they have left, will continue to repeat the old habits and will not accept the new, ending up unhappy. Similarly, those who start a new relationship without having forgotten the previous one will condemn the new relationship to failure.

Of course, not all things of the past are negative, some memories may give us strength in difficult times and it is worth to keep them, but there are emotional ties that we must delete, to prepare for a new phase of life. In fact, letting go does not mean always giving up or forget, but simply to feel grateful for what we have experienced and turn the page consciously choosing to keep the good experiences and leaving behind us the emotions that do not bring us anything and keep us stuck and make us feel bad.

The interesting thing is that in most cases you must not burn the bridges behind us, because letting go does not always mean definitely to cut with a person or with our past, but make peace with ourselves. It means reformulating our ideas and, above all, our emotions, letting go the nostalgia, fear, resentment, or excessive attachment.

In other cases, letting go acquires a physical connotation. In fact, without realizing it we cling to many things that give us a false sense of security. Therefore, a good exercise to learn how to let go, is to get rid of all those things that we do not really need and occupy a place in our home just to make us not feel alone.

The magic of empty our cup from time to time

Our society encourages us to consume, this means accumulating many things and even relationships. But from time to time you need to empty your cup. When we do it consciously we experience a miracle because breaking those bonds that held us we can really take advantage of the new opportunities that arise. When we decide to leave behind the things that limit us, we are giving ourselves the opportunity to expand our “self” to unimaginable universes.

Think that if you remain tied to a malicious couple's relationship, you can never know a person that really enriches you and allows you to grow. If you remain tied to your habits, you can not discover new ways of doing things. If you remain clung to stereotypes, you will not enjoy the wonders that hides diversity. If remain clung to hatred and resentment, you will never love completely.

Do not forget that life is constantly changing and only when you have your hands free you will grasp the new opportunities that will arise.

Some of the things we have to learn to let go are:

- The need to control everything, especially people who surround us. Be yourself and let be.

- The need to be always right, because that way you will not learn anything new.

- The need to cling to the past, because that way you can not move a light step towards the future.

- Malicious feelings such as anger, hatred and resentment, because they keep you from loving and enjoy fully the present.

Remember that happiness is always a personal decision, and that life is full of incredible opportunities, but we must be ready to seize them.


source;http://psychology-spot.blogspot.co.id/2016/07/giving-and-receiving.html

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